Stumbleupon was such a great community, and I got so much strength from my friends there, strength that had eluded me a lifetime. I always thought that once I freed myself from my ex, I would finally find my voice and let the world know exactly, through expertly chosen words what my life experience was. 

But stumble let me down. It let us all down, and we scattered like tribes over the desert. I never found my voice, it was silenced, because little did I know that fighting my ex defined me, and without it, I no longer knew who I was, and the one place on the Internet where the dynamic of sharing, and growing through sharing was gone, and with it my support network that made it possible to be introspective through extrospection.

Tumblr is good if you have something cool to share, but not every time is the thing you want to say or share cool. I don’t want to be cool, I just want to be heard. Blogspot and Posterous are vacuums, with no audience to care, twitter is for people with super amounts of energy and wit who can keep up with the one liners and deliver them with equal speed. Sometimes, things take a while to seep out of your consciousness and into pools of words.

Facebook, ha. Facebook will never own any part of my soul. I admire those friends who have figured out how to make that place reflect their personalities, but I don’t trust it to harbor my sacred deepest kept feelings. And so now I think, maybe I’ll tumblr it. I’ll write it on a sub-blog, and keep refining it until it’s ready to share. But that’s why I loved stumble so much, you could grow at your own pace, while ten people all along the way were helping pull things out of you that you didn’t know were there.

Le sigh.